Need some feedback please...

So I'm working on something and I'd really appreciate it if you would read this little bit and let me know what you think. I feel a little investment in the story and character, but I want to know if after reading this bit, you'd want to read more.

Thanks in advance. I look forward to hearing from you.

The thick smoke lodged in his throat, stopping his breath. The screams of the dying and frightened echoed in the dim light filtering through the blackness. His heavy eyes drooped and he knew that slipping into the depths of unconsciousness would be as easy as closing them only once.
"Daddy!"
Sinon Cavenaugh sat up in bed, the echo of Avery's scream still thumping in his brain. He ran his hands roughly through the thick auburn hair he'd inherited from some long-dead ancestor and swung his legs out of bed.
Three years after his wife and son died in the first of Agro's riots, Sin, as he was known to his friends and enemies, still woke to their screams nearly every morning. Only the fact that he was still working to find the man who started the war in which they had died kept him from putting a bullet in his head and joining them.
Sin shook himself and headed for the shower. The scalding water washed away the last of the nightmare, but not the pain that remained from that day. As he washed, Sin ran through the litany of tales for each scar. Afghanistan, Iraq, Somalia, Khatan City.
The last, a long and jagged line which ran from the top of his right hip to the inside of his right knee, was the most painful for many reasons. As the newest, this scar still ached. As the reason he hadn't been able to save his wife and child, this scar screamed with agony.
The phone rang while he was shaving and Sin swore as he nicked himself.
"What?" he bellowed.
"Dude, you really need to find a way to calm down," Jimmy Brant said, laughing. "I just called to see if you needed a ride to the office today."
"Damn, yeah, I do, Jimmy. The jeep went belly up last night and I can't get it to the shop until next week."
"Then no worries, my original Sin brother, your chariot will await you in ten minutes."
"Thanks," Sin grunted and ended the call. Jimmy was a morning person. Sin hated morning people.
Sin hurried to throw on his uniform. The Kevlar vest was fraying on the shoulders, but it was far too comfortable and too old of a friend or him to consider replacing. The damned suit and silk tie his employer insisted on were another story. He'd be just as happy to throw them on the next riot fire he saw.
With one whispered "I love you," directed at the photograph of the lovely blonde woman and small ginger boy, Sin shut the bedroom door and went to wait for Jimmy.

Something rolling around in my brain this morning

Pain of the body is sharp, but pain of the soul is deeper.
It is only when the pain of the body stops us from acting to save our soul that the pain becomes exquisite.

I'm giving away Smashwords copies of all of the currently available Highland Home novels in preparation for the release of book 5, Nine Lives.

Enter the Giveaway Here.

Today's Tarot Reading

Change
In the Health position
Hidden health; physical and emotional.

Meaning: Change expands your awareness and magickal ability as you embrace the harmonious interaction of the elements in constant motion.



Darkness
In the Health position
Visible health; physical and emotional.

Meaning: Try to keep despair and doubt under control; walk through these trials knowing they will end and new opportunities for happiness will come.



Seeker of Water: Nimue
In the Attitude position
Hidden mental attitude.

Meaning: A young woman with an active imagination and insight is willing to help you. Stay centered and own your own power. Flow toward new experiences, moving past the ordinary reality into Otherworldly dimensions.


Growth
In the Attitude position
Visible mental attitude.

Meaning: Opportunities for new beginnings are swiftly coming to the seeker. Use them wisely and in a positive way to gain a better life for yourself.


Swiftness
In the Relationships position
Hidden relationships.

Meaning: Messages requiring quick thinking and action are on the way. Sudden journeys may be necessary.


The Mother
In the Relationships position
Visible relationships.

Meaning: Your ideas and desires come to fruition with the proper cultivation and care.


Skill
In the Career position
Hidden career.

Meaning: Your state of consciousness is centered, and you no longer find the need to swing back and forth between polarities.


Deception
In the Career position
Visible career.

Meaning: Beware of using trickery or deceit, for your actions will be exposed, bringing disfavor and penalties down upon you. Open your eyes and face reality now, or pay a heavier cost in the future.


Passage
In the Spirit position
Hidden spiritual path.

Meaning: Affairs move swiftly, and passage away from problems as well as travel are indicated. You are able to bridge the gap between worlds.



Sustenance
In the Spirit position
Visible spiritual path.

Meaning: A time of feasting and celebration, Sustenance encourages you to accept the earthly and divine gifts that are given to you and to be more consciously aware of them.



Seeker of Air: Cliodna
In the Outcome position
Outcome of the present path.

Meaning: A time of renewal and beginnings, it is essential to listen to your inner voice and move in the direction it leads you. You may find yourself feeling totally exposed as you have nothing left to fear.